Forgiveness

Forgiveness is easy. If you love somebody, and I mean truly unconditionally love them, it can be done. Forgetting is the tricky part. When somebody hurts you, it is a deep, deep festering wound. Honestly, real pain can only be inflicted by the people who matter, and it just rips something apart inside of you to have someone you love and trust turn on you. The world in which you exist is no longer the same, changed eternally, and you just cannot, no matter how much you want to, go back to "before".

Forgiveness is the magic. I don't understand how it works, really, but it is tangible. And it takes its own time. It absolutely cannot be rushed, you just realize one day that something in your soul has been soothed. It took a process to get to that point, and if it is a true forgiveness, then a new facet of your relationship has been created. You and your transgressor have reached a peace, and your relationship has moved forward. You accept that you are both only human, and you hope that you get the same grace should you ever need it. Then one day, some seemingly inconsequential random thing reminds you of that original hurt.

And it still hurts. Really bad. But you're not in the middle of it any more. And you realize . . . it's ok to hurt. It's ok to be pissed off that it happened. And most of all, it's ok that you ignored your stupid pride and remembered that the love you feel for that person is so much bigger than a mistake. It's ok that you forgave, in fact it feels really good.